Moody moody moody T_T

Today, I get back my probability test 1 paper. I got less than half of one third of the full marks. Yi Tyng and Jia Yee tell me not to be sad. But I can't control the tears from falling down. My class ended at 2pm and I reached home at 2.30pm. I took a shower and I start to watch drama until 9pm. I really don't have the mood to do other things. I cry while watching the drama is not totally because of the touching scenes but also because of the marks. I did and understand all the tutorials and notes but still I don't get the result I want. I start to feel like giving up.
I am very angry with my assignment's group members. They have so many ideas on how to do the assignment but they never get it started. Then when I come up with my idea, some of them seem to be not agree with it. With my idea, we can have more points for the proposal and it will be easier to write. But they say they don't want to have more problems and add more things. You are just lazy! I don't want to argue but I also don't want bad marks for my assignment.

Whr should I go?

After two weeks tests, at last I got some time to blog.

I don't feel like going home because there are too many problems there. My grandfather don't want to stay with us. He always say we are not treating him well. We give him food, let him watch the television as he wish, did not scold him. What the hell makes him thinks that we are not treating him well. He brings a chair and sits in front of the television as if the television is his. We totally can't watch anything. Everyday talk alone, don't know what the hell is he scolding. I will sure hear some bad words from him every morning if I am at home. Last time, he said that my dad is not his son anymore because of money. He wants my dad to return him the money that he paid for the down payment of the house immediately. My parents have to borrow from my mom's sis's boyfriend who is actually not close to my parents. He as an outsider is willing to borrow RM30000 to my parents. But he as a father wants his own son to pay him back immediately. He even take away the rice cooker that he bought. My parents need the rice cooker for their business. My parents said they will return him immediately after they buy a new one but he insist to take it away. What kind of father is this. Well, after my dad came back from England, he shifts from my uncle's house to my house. He got three sons but the two other sons never want to stay him. He gave them money to buy house and car and support them in anyway but he didn't do anything for my dad. However the one that is actually taking care of him is my dad. And now he dares to say we are not treating him well. Does he deserves my respect? FUCK HIM LA!!!! 

Even until now, my dad is on his side. My dad even argue with my mom because of him. I sometimes do not understand my dad. I know he is a good son but I don't think his father deserves it. 

I can stay in my hostel if I don't want to go home but I am not happy there either. I feel so desperate there. I don't feel that I am part of them. Previously, I used to thought that relationship between house-mates is very good but I am wrong. Relationship with course-mates will be better. I can hardly find a topic to talk to them. We are dealing with different people and different things. Now yi hong is not here because he is sick. I become more desperate than ever.